A single rose braved the harsh autumn winds. She watched in appraisal.
How had things gotten so out of control? Life had proven once again that it had the upper hand.
She thought back to her treatment of Joshua. How cold and awful she had been to him. All he had wanted was closure, all she had given him was disregard.
Now she was alone and that terrified her more than anything.
Her secret desire was to be loved. For someone to be attracted to her mess... How childish. Life was not a romance novel.
She stared at her reflection in disgust. Insomnia and stress had left her face gaunt and her hair lank.
Natalie collapsed on to her bed, head in hands. Within the past two months, everything she held dear became lost or was jeopardized.

I’d best explain how my misery started. I guess I’ll start with the day I met him.

I was 20, a junior in college. He was an infatuation gone wrong.
I was on break in between classes, sitting in a cafe, mindlessly staring out the window. He walked in, passively, nothing extraordinary about him. Except his jawline. Odd as it may seem, I go for the jawline. It defines a person’s face and finishes off what may seem plain.
He carried a messenger bag and appeared to be a typical college student.
Time ensnared my futile staring. I didn’t want him to think me some sort of stalker, but I was far away, my body and mind innocent passerby’s. This occurred for a week, me spending my time hoping to gawk at this man.
There was a sharp whoosh from the frigid wind and the clang of a door. I looked up from my laptop at his back. Finally, I decided to go talk to him. His image had been possessing my thoughts, controlling my day. I started with a cliche “hello” and introduced myself as a nearby student. He smiled politely, yet seemed guarded. I boldly sat down across from him and studied his laced fingers as if they would reveal an important secret.
His name was Josh, he was a sophomore destined to major in journalism. He wanted to travel. He talked some more and his voice seemed to float through me. How could I obsess over him like this? Was it a longing to know what made his eyes the cold blue that they were or why he seemed to hold back? A fault of the human mind? But here we were, talking about mundane, average aspects of daily life.
We parted as acquaintances, knowing full well we would see each other again.

Two years had passed since she had met him in the cafe. Time had seemed to slow down for them, letting them fall in love. She just had to go out an ruin it all, didn’t she? Now that it was all over, time speed up to make up for itself.
She had lived in a dreamlike trance through it all, abusing every aspect of it. Stupidity and love seem to go hand in hand. Her paranoia had kicked in, because for once in her life, things were going well.